Finding a Preschool

Well over a year ago, while I was pregnant with Hank we looked at some preschools for Goldie. I did this as part of the transition process when she turned 3. I didn't see a place that I loved, so we decided to utilize some community programs this year and revisit the preschool options when she was turning 4.

I began my search anew in February when I saw that a Montessori school was having an open house. It was nice, but it seemed like there would be a lot of rules for Goldie to remember and the room had a lot of furniture for her to navigate around. Goldie also learns best in an environment that is free of visual clutter. I spoke with the teacher and explained what Goldie's strengths and weaknesses were. I did not tell her my daughter has Down syndrome. In my experience, it brings up too many stereotypes.

The school's only tuition option was for 5 days a week, so I decided to keep looking. It would cost us a fortune in gas to make 10 trips a week! My next call was to my neighbor. Her kids went to a Montessori school that was 5 minutes away, but only advertises by word-of-mouth. She was happy to call the owner and talk to her about Goldie.

The owner, Miss M, has really exceeded all of my expectations. She has met Goldie one-on-one twice and has had me observe the classroom one morning by myself. Before I sat in on a class, she told me "I don't want you to get overwhelmed and think that Goldie can't do this, because she CAN." Miss M. has asked me to bring Goldie once a week for 1/2 just to get her used to the classroom and allow them to get to know her. I must have looked a little nervous because she assured me that Goldie will be going to school there as long is that is what I want. The plan right now is for Goldie to attend two mornings a week in the fall and maybe add a third day after the Christmas break.

A couple months ago I was asking myself, "Am I crazy to think that my child with Down syndrome can go to a typical preschool without an IEP and supports?". But, after seeing Goldie in the classroom and feeling the kindness of the students and teachers, I know Goldie will just blossom at school next year. She is already requesting "school" on a daily basis.

This is my first post using a blogging app. If it works out, I may be able to post more often than once a month!

Free Kindergarten ABA Apps for Autism Awareness Month

Kindergarten.com is offering all of their ABA apps free for the month of April in honor of Autism Awareness Month. I was actually going to purchase some this week after hearing about them over at Unringing the Bell. Really, I bought an iTunes card at the grocery store this weekend so I could get my fuel discount. Glad I didn't have time to use it!

FYI: The ones listed under the heading Flashcards were always free and the rest of them were 99 cents.

I would recommend the receptive language ones and I downloaded the Action Flashcards for Goldie because verbs are something she has been working on in speech.

Goldie Knows the Alphabet

One thing I've learned is that Goldie is not a performer. She does not like to be tested on what she knows. A couple nights ago, Goldie got out her alphabet letters, so I grabbed the camcorder on the off chance that she would show off for me. I got lucky! Her are a couple videos of her identifying the letters of the alphabet. Part 2 includes some lowercase letters. You'll notice that instead of naming a couple of the vowels she tells me what sound they make.

Warning: the lighting is poor, her pajamas mismatched and the slip cover for our couch was in the laundry, but this is real life with 4 kids!

Homeschool Preschool - Color Sorting

Goldie has been keeping me very busy this fall doing all kinds of preschooly things. (I've been heating my kitchen with my laminator!)  Goldie's latest achievement is sorting by color.  Sorting is an important part of an early math curriculum. We started working on this around her second birthday at the urging of her vision therapist. I didn't think she was ready for actual sorting so I focused more on just learning colors. Once Goldie was able to sign her colors (thank-you Signing Time) I was able to know how well she could identify and label her colors.

First I tried having her sort with Busy Bugs. But, she was so distracted by all the different types of bugs that she didn't care what color they were. Spider, caterpillar, fly, etc...

Then I had a lightbulb moment when Swatcho left her Sorry! game on the kitchen table.

Sure enough, without the distracting bugs, Goldie was able to sort the red from the blue and place them on the correct squares. Another important math concept is one to one correspondence.

After this, I gave Goldie red, yellow, and blue buckets with a pile of colored cubes.  She shocked me by immediately sorting them out. I had to run and get green and white bowls. If more than one color was stuck together she would pull them apart and place each cube in its correct container.

Moments like these just blow me away. I find myself thinking back to when Goldie was born and being told she had Down syndrome and then at a year old when I was told she was legally blind. I wondered then if these days would ever come. Now, I see her love of learning and how she wakes up one day and just does something she's never done, but acts like she's always known how to do it. And my heart overflows.

Inchstones

Goldie has met some little milestones, some call these inchstones, that I need to document before I forget the details. She is 3 1/2 and moving full steam ahead toward 4!

- Goldie can dress and undress herself, even in her brother's clothes. She mastered this skill completely on her own, all I did was leave baskets of laundry around for her to practice. BTW, she can also fold washcloths, handtowels, and diapers.

- Last night, upon noticing that her sisters were dressed for bed, she walked upstairs, got her pajama top and matching bottoms out of her drawer, came back down and threw them at me.

- At dinner, she served everyone salad, with tongs. Weeks of climbing on the table to get second helpings has finally paid off.

- At Children's Hour, they ran out of tiny plastic cups for snack time. So the kids had to drink out of regular styrofoam cups. I just knew that Goldie would need help. She told me to go away and drank two servings of apple juice without spilling or choking!

- Before snack, they had a visit from the fire department. When they asked for a volunteer to demonstrate "stop, drop, and roll" Goldie walked up to the front of the group, dropped to the ground and rolled. She was saying roll the whole time, then she stood up and clapped for herself. All the volunteer fire fighters knew her name before they went home. ;)

- Wishes do come true, I have another little girl who loves Madeline. My oldest was all about Madeline, so I've been saving all the dolls and books hoping they would get some more love.

- When I was reading "line", as Goldie calls her new favorite story, I stopped several times (leaving off the last word) and she was able to complete the rhyme! Another first!

- Goldie is really into learning her colors. She loves to sign and say them. She can sort red, blue, yellow, and green. 

Goldie Goes to Children's Hour

I've mentioned before that we are not sending Goldie to preschool this year. So, you may be wondering "What does she do?"

I decided to sign her up for a program at a local church called Children's Hour. Goldie goes once a week for 2 hours. My neighbor is her teacher and I'm the permanent helper in her class. It is an all volunteer program that one of my other children attended for two years. No one has any type of education background, let alone any special ed experience. My mom, who has worked in early childhood classrooms as long as I can remember, described it as "developmentally inappropriate." Which is why I love it!

There is no formal instruction or curriculum. No IEPs, no therapists to count how many times she gets something right. Just Goldie and 8 of her peers.
They do have free time with play-do or puzzles, opening songs, weather bear, craft, snack, gym or music, and a bible story.

I expected the first couple of months to be pretty rough. After an awful summer of "Story Time for Children of All Abilities" at the library, I set very low expectations. Sitting still while someone reads to a large group is not one of Goldie's abilities. Yet. I even second guessed my decision to sign her up for a program with only typical children and no adaptations. However, she has been doing great!

My proudest moments are when I see her at snack time, eating and DRINKING from a cup, and holding her hand as she walks down the steps. I had set a goal at the beginning of summer that she would be able to do both of these things by September. Goldie has worked so hard and I love to see the joy on her face when she has her own miniature cup of juice just like all her little friends. Sometimes, after snack is over, she'll sneak over and try to pour herself another drink.

During music, Goldie does all the hand motions that go with the songs or she and I use ASL signs. In the gym she has been able to do all of the activities with no more help than the other children need.

I've been observing how the children relate to each other. There are two boys that come together and I also bring my niece with us. I have yet to see the children really talk to each other and try to form new friendships. The boys stick together and my niece always wants to be near Goldie. Goldie is ready to be friends with anyone, especially the boys. She likes to sit by them and put her hand on their backs. One of them even seems to be looking out for her when she needs help.

The biggest challenge is craft time. The first week wasn't bad, just coloring and some tiny stickers. Then, they moved craft to a room with bins of toys. So, now she wants to ditch the hard fine motor work to go play in the toys. I keep redirecting her back to the craft table and try to give her enough help that it isn't overwhelming to her. At home she has shown a big interest in coloring. I keep a desk with paper, crayons, and markers in the kitchen for her. When they sent home a coloring page I put it on her desk. She sat down on her own and colored each flower yellow. This is the first time she has ever done anything like this! My pile of Goldie's artwork is growing.

At this point, I'm very happy with our decision and the activities we've chosen for Goldie. I think between Speech, OT, Children's Hour and our homeschool field trips, she's got plenty of learning opportunities, but she isn't over scheduled. Which is good for me too!

IEP Evaluations

I thought I should take a brake from my babymoon for a quick update. The last 4 weeks have been fabulous. Hank is such a sweet and, dare I say, easy baby. My husband and I both agree that everything has just been way too easy this time around. For example, baby Hank was nursing within 30 minutes of his birth. He knew exactly what to do. And when to do it. No pumping, no finger feeder, no syringes. My first two were also very sleepy babies and I had a hard time keeping them awake to eat. Not this guy. The best part is that we know to appreciate all these little things. Part of me keeps waiting for his therapists to walk through the door. I keep reminding myself that our new arrival didn't come with an IFSP. Ha!

Speeking of Early Intervention Goldie's evals for her IEP are today. My husband was supposed to be home, but he has a new schedule and has to work. So, Grandma is watching the big girls while I take Goldie and Hank. And to make it even more fun, our appointment is the same as Goldie's naptime. She's asleep right now and she refused to eat lunch. This is the problem with scheduling things so far in advance.

I tried to get out of it by canceling last week. Let me explain why, Hank Sr. and I have been talking for the last couple months about what we want for Goldie next year. This included observing an inclusion preschool classroom. I was less than impressed. After discussing our various options, we have decided not to send Goldie to preschool next year. Originally, we were told that if we waited until September to send her that they would not provide her services and we would have to get them privately. Soooo, I thought if we weren't sending her to pre-k she wouldn't get services from the county. But, I got a phone call yesterday saying they would still provide. Funny how things change. When I gave my husband the new information he said "It feels like were dealing on a new car."

Giving credit where credit is due

Goldie had her quarterly eval this week. I have to say it was fabulous! She has made so much progress in the last 3 months. She now knows over 100 signs and her speech is increasing slowly and steadily. Her fine motor skills have taken off and she is completing puzzles on her own along with beginning to draw. I could go on and on!

So, I was bragging about Goldie to a family member and their reply was "Are you going to do something in March, so she doesn't backslide, since you aren't sending her to preschool?"

Well, that caught me completely off guard. I explained, again, that our immediate family, has helped Goldie get to where she is today and we will continue to do so. And when I say we have helped Goldie, what I mean is that we give her opportunities and encouragement. Like you would with any child.

Goldie is the reason for her own success. I'm so tired of this idea that she would just be happy to sit and stare at the wall if it wasn't for Early Intervention. I remember reading books on DS when she was born that gave the very distinct impression that children with DS were not motivated to meet milestones or learn new skills on their own. Then the IFSP meeting came and the echoed those same thoughts. 2 1/2 years later I can say: what a bunch of BS!!


Here is our star! If you're wondering, she is putting cupcake picks into a pegboard to make a flower garden. Cute, huh?

Transition - The First Meeting

This week was the first meeting in Goldie's transition from home based to school based Early Intervention services. I still remember the very first IFSP meeting. I think she was only 5 weeks old. There was a woman named Brenda asking me what my goals for Goldie were during the first year. Who ever thought I would be coming up with goals for our new baby? All I wanted to do was feed her and take a nap. Somehow, thought started forming about what I wanted her immediate future to look like. I went back through 8 years of being a mom and watching my other babies grow and decided that is what we would aim for. One thing I specifically remember telling them was I wanted Goldie to eat real food. Not baby food, just like my other kids did. Brenda looked up at me to see if I was serious. Then she said " Well, we'll have to make sure she can do it safely." Goldie did accomplish this goal. I had to compromise a little along the way, but not much. The lesson I learned is that you can't be afraid to aim high. If I had been wrong it would have been ok. We would have given Goldie the support she needed and adjusted our expectations. But, we should always give her the chance to succeed.

Now that I've gotten way off track from my original topic... I admit I've been pretty worried about how this transition will go. You just get used to dealing with one system and now its time to move on to another. I've also never liked the idea that my daughter is part of "the system". I've always enjoyed my parental autonomy and really resent anything that infringes on it. I was laying in bed thinking about how I could be at peace with this process when I realized the obvious. Hank and I are still her parents, we are still in charge. We have the final say in what services our daughter receives. If we don't like what Early Intervention has to offer, we have choices. We can even choose to take her to private therapists and pay for prek ourselves. We are not at the mercy of the system.

I woke up in a great mood the day of the meeting. I made a list of all Goldie's strengths and the things she is still learning to do. (Good thing, because I was asked for these) I also wrote down some questions. Hank was watching the girls, so I went alone. This is fine because he tends to be too nice to people. He's great at compromise and I'm great at sticking to my guns! The meeting consisted of myself, Goldie's current SC, and a man whose title was Early Intervention Service Coordinator. I guess he's going to be the new SC.

It went about as I expected and he wasn't able to answer all my questions. I give him props for admitting that and not just giving me bad information. He asked what we had in mind for Goldie. I told him, "We decided that the Fall after she turns 3 would like to enroll her in a typical preschool setting." That was followed by him trying to convince me to enroll her in the special ed pre-k in March. I simply repeated "We won't be sending her anywhere until the Fall after she turns 3." He realized rather quickly I wouldn't be changing my mind. I did explain our reasoning (new baby), but he just raised his eyebrows and went back to writing. Whatever. I guess he took it personally.

Next came the question of how will Goldie receive services if she is not in pre-k or daycare. He didn't know and told me to ask at her eval in January. Wrote that ? down. I also have to ask how they will implement her oral motor therapy in the classroom.

Then we talked about typical pre-k options. Not far from us is a typical preschool that has slots for students with IEPs and has staff from EI in the classroom in addition to their own teachers. I had already heard about this option and we are very interested in this for Goldie. My big question is how do I make sure she gets one of those slots? I was told "We just put her in there" Yeah, right. I don't believe that for a second.

Finally, came the paperwork. I was asked to sign a paper allowing them to bill Medicaid for Goldie's services. I asked if this would cause a problem if we pursued private therapy. He said "no, well it shouldn't, unless their billed on the same day for multiple services." I said I would bring that form back later. I could have signed "No" and her services would still be free, but I wanted more time to think about it.

Overall, I wasn't impressed. I had some big safety issues with the building. Goldie could have easily walked out the front door. (I know people who work there that have found kids wandering the building) There was no interest in Goldie as a member of our family. There was a brief explanation of why inclusion is a great idea, but segregation (my word, not his) of children with special needs is sometimes necessary. Then it was my turn to make faces.

The best part of the day though - while I was gone Hank decided to play outside with the chainsaw so the girls were on Goldie duty. They got her to sleep for a nap, fed her a snack, and took her to the potty. Where she did number 1 & 2! (Now that's a whole post for later.)