Building On Our Children's Strengths

I read a post at The Rocking Pony which had a link to this great video called Animal School. It felt like a gentle reminder that I need to keep trusting my mother's intuition.

Mini Me is getting a little help in math from her principal. But, I decided to let her focus on what she loves at home. I took her to the library to get some books and bought a book we can both read while I was at Target this week. I was honest with the principal. I told him my one on one time with her is precious and I'm not going to spend it doing math facts. I thanked him for understanding my job as her mom and our needs as a family.

Then, she devoured the library books. I bought her an American Girl book at Barnes & Noble this weekend (yes, I need help with my book addiction) and she made quick work of that one, too. The other book I bought was the young reader's version of Three Cups of Tea. I was looking for a book for myself, but thought this would be a better purchase. Less money and we can both read it. It also has pictures and maps that aren't in the adult version.

Here's a picture from about 5 years ago! She'll be 10 this week so I'm allowed to reminisce.

Feet

I talked to Goldie's PT about her walk. I thought I noticed her walking more on the insides of her feet. She said she had noticed her "turning in" a little bit. I told her I'm open to suggestions. So next time we see her we are going to talk about getting Goldie something more supportive than the shoes she has now. I still have her in soft soled shoes. But I always let my kids go barefoot, so I'm not sure what we'll end up with. I still feel like there are so many little things (and big) to learn about with DS.

I know this is silly, but it bothers me. It's just another reminder that things are different. And then a family member stopped by with some "stuff" yesterday. One thing was a pair of socks for Goldie. They were marked ages 3-5 years on the bottom. I commented that Goldie has always had big feet. So, this family member starts telling me no, she doesn't. Then compares them to my niece's and goes on about how my niece is running and Goldie isn't. WTH? My niece is 2 months older than Goldie and has always worn shoes about 2 sizes smaller. And oh yeah, she doesn't have Down syndrome! Now, her cousin's feet may have caught up, but for a kids with DS, Goldie still has some good sized feet. Maybe I should invite this person next time we go to Target and let her chase Goldie around the store. he he he.

Edit: Here they are while she sleeps sideways in the recliner.

Teeth

After many wrestling matches with Goldie and her toothbrush. I finally surrendered. She wins. I put the toothpaste on the brush, hand it over and let Goldie do her thing. When she's done I manage to do a tiny bit of brushing. So, lets hope the xylitol does its job.

I don't have any pics of the inside of her mouth, but let me tell ya, she has a ton of teeth. Her last two year molar and two eye teeth have broken through and are taking their good ole time coming in. I was hoping she would get her teeth later, allowing a little more time for her mouth to grow. But, she's followed the same pattern as her sisters. (who are both being monitored by an orthodontist, sigh.)

Getting the brush wet


Slurping


More slurping

Grrrr

I still don't know if my blog is letting anyone comment. Then I noticed that the sidebar isn't updating with new blog posts.

And I think I have strep throat. I have a Dr appt for later.

The "R" Word

I was hanging out with the girls tonight when Mini Me told me about something that happened at school today. One of the girls was "teaching" the other kids how to hit themselves in the chest with their hand while saying retard. I don't think I've seen that move since I was in grade school. I explained why it was wrong and got online with her to show her the shirts Lisa at Finnian's Journey and her son made. But, I was pleasantly surprised to find Lisa's recent post.

Just like Lisa, I'm shocked at the girl who initiated this. You see, her parents are leaders at the Vacation Bible School my girls attend every summer. When I pick them up, her dad is always up there singing with the kids. On the other hand, Hank only goes to church at Christmas and Easter. He's also a truck driver and has a mouth like one. Sorry, but its true, as the daughter of a sailor this didn't phase me when I met him. The irony of this is not lost on me. Now, I also know as a parent sometimes our children do things that do not reflect our values. My children have come home and told me some awful things that were said by their grandparents. I'm just glad they knew what they were hearing is wrong and not to repeat it.

Oh, and if you want to read more posts about the "R" word Joyce had something to say, too.

I'm hoping Mini Me will be inspired by Lisa's blog and stand up to the kids at school. But, I don't think it will happen tomorrow. She still feels like "the new kid" and is pretty shy. I'm wondering if I talked to the guidance counselor if she has a lesson that would be appropriate for this situation. I don't want to see kids get in trouble, I want them to learn why using the "R" word is wrong. I want them to know the people they are hurting and be able to empathize with them. I have a chance to volunteer at the school next month. Maybe it wouldn't be a bad idea to go and bring Goldie with me.

IQ Tests Suck

I had a meeting with Mini Me's teachers, principal and school psychologist. I was given the scores from her IQ test. It was suprising. I expected her to do better on one portion than the other given her struggles with math and following directions. But, her scores were very similar. So, according to their numbers, she should have difficulties with language arts, reading, spelling etc...

I just can't reconcile that information with the daughter I KNOW. Language has always been her thing. She loves to read at home and excels in reading, grammer, vocabulary and spelling at school. My only guess is that her lack of skills in the direction following department is impacting her test score.

The principal was very positive and genuinely wants to help. He reminded me that there are multiple types of intelligence and this test only measures 2 of them. He will be working with Mini Me himself on some math concepts, since they don't have the staff available at the right time of day.

This was one of those times that I was so thankful for having a child with DS. I know from Goldie's evaluations that how a child performs on one day, at one moment in time, is NO indicator of their true potential or how they will perform 6 months from now. (I told them this) And if those numbers are right, then I guess it shows how far children can go with loving, involved parents who expect the best.

Playgroup

Occasionally, I get surveys from our EI agency or the county. I always write in the comments section that I would like them to sponsor a playgroup. My mom ran a playgroup at our church when Mini Me and Swatcho were younger. She had an art center, water or rice table, housekeeping area, puzzles, circle time and snack time. It was fabulous. She has since moved on and I haven't found anything comparable.

Then in October Goldie's Service Coordinator gives me a call to say that she has been invited to join a playgroup once a month. She thought I would have already heard since the agency my mom is working for is organizing the playgroup. So, I called Mom to get the scoop. She tells me that the playgroup is for Early Head Start families and the county asked them to allow 5 families from EI to participate. Not everyone wanted to collaborate with EI, but Mom told them they would do it as long as Goldie was one of the 5 kids. So here's how it went:

Week One: Circle time, free play with toys, craft, more free play in gym area, eat lunch, read a story

Week Two: Circle time, free play with toys while listening to immature mother brag about how advanced her 5 month old is because he can pull to stand and crawl, play with balls in gym, eat lunch, read a story

Week Three: Kids have free play while parents learn how to plan a meal, eat lunch, read a story

But, I was really looking forward to the one on one time with my Goldie Girl.

The Good:
~ Goldie played with some toys we don't have a lot of, like cars. She even imitated the boys crawling and pushing the cars, which is something we've been working on in PT.

~ It was great to see how much progress Goldie made from month to month

~ Lunch was free and they were very accommodating of our food allergy

~ This month Goldie had a blast running around the gym (I skipped the story and let her run loose, setting a bad example for all the other parents and children)

~ One week, she ate off of a paper plate and even tried to use utensils

~ I got to play with my baby and just my baby :)

The Not So Good:

~ Immature mothers. They were just annoying. Even when I was a young, new mom, I never was a baby bragger. People can see my kids, I don't need to point out that they are walking or talking. Those things are kind of obvious and don't define my self worth. I decided I would go in with blinder on, ignore them and just focus on being with Goldie.

~ Hank has to watch Swatcho because she isn't allowed to come. It is also in the morning and sometimes Swatcho ends up not doing school that day because we also have PT that afternoon.

~ I'm the only mom who went consistently and I think the only one whose child has a diagnosis. I think the other EI kids just have delays because I couldn't tell who they were. I wonder if they would have chosen Goldie if her grandma hadn't made them?

~ Its really just a government sponsored parenting class disguised as a play group. Reading a book, planning a meal...Don't. waste. my. time. Goldie's book collection rivals that of our public library and I don't care what they say the breading on chicken nuggets is not a substitute for potatoes! I want her to have experiences I don't always provide at home, like the gym, water table, circle time, and crafts.

I called the Service Coordinator the next day to say we wouldn't be back. Then I signed up for Family Kindermusik through Swatcho's school.


What has Goldie been up to?



Her new thing is to pretend she's holding a camera and saying "jeeze" when I try to take a picture of her. She will also walk around with my camera in front of her while she repeats jeeze, jeeze, jeeze.



Hiding from therapists




and learning to blow her nose.